I share what I know from personal experiences. Childhood was never easy; I grew up with alcoholism, sexual abuse, domestic violence and abandonment. I moved in with my dad and stepmom, and attended therapy. However, fear always had a hold on me, I was shy and quiet growing up, easily intimidated by people, I was an emotional eater, overweight, with low self-esteem.
Any personal relationships were never successful due to my self-doubt, negative thoughts, overthinking, and a “flying by the seat of my pants” chaos lifestyle. I often thought; I was an inconvenience to others, and I didn’t deserve things in life. I led a risky lifestyle from my later teen years through to my mid-twenties. This risky side of my life I found gave me a sense of worth, it made me happy, but the only problem was it was just a quick fix.
Thus, came parenthood. My plate was full; I was a single mom, working full time and was attending school on academic overload. All of the negative thoughts and chaos I ensued, I associated with being over extended. From my perspective, I wasn’t down talking to myself, I just couldn’t fix the problem or make it work. The reality: I was putting myself down, talked negatively about myself and called myself names. I functioned on “autopilot” every day like muscle memory. Everyday was the same routine, the same drive, the same process, the same thoughts both at home and at work.
“Autopilot” was not a healthy approach; it served no purpose except to just keep me moving on to whatever needed to be accomplished. Being a single mom, this is not the example I wanted to provide my daughter. Not to mention the impact it had on her. She was entering pre-teen and I needed to be there for her. I thought I was doing an amazing job as a mom; I was working full-time, I was going to school, I was physically present, and I wasn’t an alcoholic! In my head I thought I was winning at being a mom!
The reality: my daughter was taking on more responsibility than she should have, I was disconnected and missing those mindful moments with her and life in general. I had minimal memories of her infant/toddler years. I was still struggling to gain a grasp on life; I felt like garbage, I was alone, overweight and didn’t have a true outlook on my future. I was in school because we are all taught education is the key to financial success, so I thought. I graduated with my BA only to realize I had nothing else in life to distract me from facing the ugly past I had been able to avoid this entire time. Yes, I said it……..I was keeping myself so busy to avoid having to deal with my traumas of my past. Identifying with my job to give me a sense of worth, I became married to my job. I realized something needed to change, I didn’t know how or where to start.
I started small, with doing small things for myself. I happened to find my niche that helped me find my body's capabilities, leading me to my emotional and mental healing. It turned my inner spark to a flame! It deepened my relationship with myself, while helping me balance everything else. It taught me to be in the moment, to not overthink, it challenged me on so many levels, causing me to face many fears and accomplish my set goals. It gave me intuition. It was the beginning of my personal journey of learning myself, loving myself and healing myself. I lost weight and still continue to do so; I learned my worth and found my confidence. I fell in love with myself!!!! I reached self-empowerment x100!! All that I learned on my journey and continue to learn about myself is amazing and I can’t wait to help you do the same!
Working in a community emergency department and urgent care has only made many relationships stronger. I had a passion for helping others and a niche for relationship building. Through my professional growth into the management team of healthcare really helped me realize one thing; I am meant to help others. More often than not, I would have a team member in my office looking for guidance or advice, whether personal or professional. My door was always open for them and they often sought out my perspective.
I love being a part of people’s lives helping them grow, sharing my knowledge and supporting them; no one is ever alone! Together we can reach this for you! I will help you face your challenges or fears and conquer them through guidance, encouragement, and accountability. All you need to do is be ready to invest in yourself, work on yourself and commit to the end. I successfully helped many team members and friends reach their goals both personally and professionally. My goal is to share my gift by helping you reach your greatest potential!!!